The incredible excuses of Dominic Cummings
by Steve Pottinger
The dog ate my homework.
I did not have sexual relations with that band, ABBA.
The dog is called Fido, er… Tyson, er… Boris, no… Dog.
Your homework is in the cat.
My wife has always known me as Barnard.
I do not recognise that allegation.
I do not recognise that castle.
My dog has no name.
I’m everywhere and nowhere, baby.
Fuel tanks the size of Mars.
A big boy did it and drove away.
I do not believe in homework.
I have no dog.
Steve Pottinger is a performance poet who's passionate about the power of poetry to create connections between people. He believes in making an audience laugh and think and decide that poetry isn't so bad after all.